Don’t expect your husband to know you need “me time” as a stay at home mom
Ok first thing some stay at home moms are probably asking right now is, “Ughh, you actually get ‘me time?!’ What’s that?” Well, unless you are married to a very intuitive man, this is something you have to carve out for yourself. Just tell your spouse it is essential for your well being. Which in my opinion it is essential. I married such a thoughtful, generous man. That being said, he has never once come home from work and said, “You need some time for yourself. Why don’t you take a much deserved break and I’ll handle dinner, dishes, the kiddo. You relax.” My point is that if you’re going to get “me time” it’s all on you. Nobody in the world is going to carve this out for you.
If possible give your husband a heads up so he can prepare himself for it and you can look forward to it
I feel so blessed to be able to be a stay at home mom working from home. Believe me. But when it’s been one of those days when my kiddo is having a really tough time being his own awesome little human and instead has decided he is going to be clingy. ALL. day. And when I’m using the phrase, “Use your words” ALL. day. long. trying to convince my kiddo that his first language is actually English and not whine, well, let’s just say these kinds of days call for “me time” at the end. On said days, I’ll text hubby, “It’s been a really tough day. I need a break tonight.” No matter what goes on the rest of the day, I have this little break to look forward to. Also hubby can mentally prepare himself to still be “on” when he gets home.
Lastly, here’s the most important part of “me time”
Ok mammas, the one small thing you can do to improve your “me time” is to leave the house. Or the apartment. Or the condo. I have taken breaks away from my kiddo in the other room, and let me tell you, it doesn’t feel relaxing if you can hear crying or whining in the other room. More importantly, if your kiddo can open the door to the room you’re in and interrupt your “me time” even if hubby is on duty, it makes for a really crappy break. Gosh, even if hubby can keep your kiddo from entering the room, you will inevitably feel stress levels rise just to hear “mommy, mommy, mommy!” in the other room.
Why you sometimes need “me time” apart from when kiddo naps
Truly relaxing “me time” means you are not on duty, you are not on call, and you can not be interrupted. See, dads might think that a kiddo’s nap time is all the “me time” that a stay at home mom needs. That’s not true. First because moms usually have a gazillion things they need to do for the house that they can’t do while kiddo is awake. Second, it’s not truly as relaxing because it gets interrupted. You’re essentially still on call. The beauty of truly relaxing “me time” is the fact that you can’t get interrupted. You can sit in a bookstore and finish that entire magazine. You can sit in a cafe and finish that entire muffin.
So what should you do?
If you live in an apartment or condo, the simple solution is go to your sky lounge, outdoor terrace, rooftop terrace, or clubhouse. If you live in a house, you can leave and just go wherever you want! I love going to the library. It’s quiet, free, and I can look at my favorite fashion magazines and check out new movie releases. I can sit in the stillness of it all and finish a magazine.
If you want more ideas of stuff you can do during your “me time,” I wrote an exhaustive list in this post.
I’d love to know, what do you do during your “me time?”
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